Smirnoff Sunstroke (1974)

In the words of Mrs. Kasha Davis:

THERE’S ALWAYS TIME FOR A COCKTAIL!

So here we have another cocktail courtesy of whoever did the advertising for Smirnoff in the 1970s.

Here’s the original text for The Sunstroke:

The Sunstroke
(Sometimes less is more)

For a long time we clung to the notion that longer days called for longer drinks. That any suggestion we made for summer ought to be served in a tall glass. The neatness of that logic, we now realize, blinded us to its flaws.

What matters, obviously, is not how long a drink is, but how good. So before you pack up all your stubby little glasses in mothballs, you might want to try a Sunstroke.

To make a Sunstroke, pour 1.5 oz Smirnoff and 3 oz. grapefruit juice into a short glass with ice. Add a little Triple Sec or sugar and stir. 

You know how this goes–here’s my take on it:

Cousin Tina and her husband, Carlo, are visiting from “The City.” Like everyone else I know, they basically invited themselves to stay with me. Not only stay with me–spend every single second with me.

I thought I had escaped them when I went to the backyard, but creepy Carlo cornered me. He asked if he could sit with me for one drink. I agreed to ONE DRINK.  I was relieved that he brought Sunstrokes—which are a “short” drink and not a “tall” drink. The drink can’t be short enough; I’m going to vomit if he says anything more about the volatility of the market.

To make a Sunstroke, pour 1.5 oz Smirnoff and 3 oz. grapefruit juice into a short glass with ice. Add a little Triple Sec or sugar and ask yourself, WHY AM I SHUCKING AN ENTIRE BUSHEL OF CORN? WHO THE FUCK IS EATING ALL OF THIS CORN?

And another one!

When Al asked me if I wanted to join him on his yacht, I didn’t know his alcoholic sister, Ginny, would be along for the ride. She was already blotto when I climbed aboard. We’ve only been out for an hour or so and I’ve watched Ginny down at least 4 cocktails. She refuses to drink water. Put on sunblock. Or pants.

She’s gonna fall off the boat. Or at least get sunstroke.

To make a Sunstroke, pour 1.5 oz Smirnoff and 3 oz. grapefruit juice into a short glass with ice. Add a little Triple Sec or sugar and stir.

Ginny has now officially lost her pants. She threw them overboard at a passing seagull. Along with one of my shoes. They were brand new shoes.

This was deliciousness! I don’t think it needed the sugar (I used honey because my sugar is up on a tall shelf and I was too lazy to climb up the step ladder to get it). But without the sugar it’s just a plain ‘ol Greyhound. Which is a hop, skip, and a jump from the also tasty Salty Dog!

I think I’m going to enjoy one of these tonight!