Smirnoff Daquiri (1973)

It’s National Daiquiri Day!

Here’s an advertisement for the Smirnoff Daiquiri, which they call a “modest invention.”

We were caught recently with an unexpected hankering for something different. Thumbed through a recipe book and decided on the daiquiri. The recipe called for a liquor we never use. So we improvised, and discovered the Smirnoff Daiquiri. While it’s not completely original, it is a rather nice twist on an old standby.
You might try it one day when you feel like something newfangled.
To make a Smirnoff Daiquiri, shake 2 oz Smirnoff, 1/2 oz lime juice and 1/2 tsp sugar with cracked ice. Strain into chilled glass. 

Evelyn and Hal could not believe it they made it through their dinner party. It was such a disaster.

“Thank god they were so drunk on those Smirnoff Daiquris they didn’t notice that the chicken in the biryani was raw!” said Evelyn.

Hal replied, “Yep. Because if this dinner had cost me that promotion, you wouldn’t be laughing right now, Evelyn.”

“Wow, that got dark,” said the writer who is making fun of these Smirnoff ads.

But no! It wasn’t the copious amount of vodka that got them through the dinner–it was the wish she causally made to the Pakistani Jinn as she struggled with deep frying her pakoras (which somehow managed to be both undercooked and burnt).

Little do they know that the Jinn had entered their home.

and was here

To collect

Their

SOULS.

To make a Smirnoff Daiquiri, shake 2 oz Smirnoff, 1/2 oz lime juice, and 1/2 tsp sugar with cracked ice. Strain into a chilled glass and regret not wishing for Hal’s death instead. 

This was totally drinkable. Tasted like a Margarita.

 

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3 thoughts on “Smirnoff Daquiri (1973)

  1. My father, who made a mean daiquiri, is rolling over in his urn right now. Can’t call it a daiquiri without RUM! As always, your copy is MUCH better than Smirnoff’s! And I’m giggling and a little scared.

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