185. Eggs Benedict

I know I am in the minority when I say that I love “falling back.” I love the fact that I woke up refreshed and am writing this before 8am on a beautiful, sunny, blue-skied Sunday morning. It doesn’t bother me that the days get longer. It getting darker earlier makes me want to go to sleep earlier. I love all of it.

So, here I am, on my laptop at 7:45am, sitting with a nice glass of orange juice and watching 90s sitcom reruns on TBS. And since it is the morning, I’m going to share with you 185. Eggs Benedict.

Although I made it for a weeknight dinner. Dinner is Served 1972 said it is ok: If serving this menu for dinner, bake or buy cookies for  dessert and use the melons balls as an appetizer.

(can I apologize for how frickin huge all of my photos are? If I scale them down wordpress won’t let me rotate them. It is terribly annoying. I am sorry).

Mr. Sauce wanted dinner at 7:30. According to the handy-dandy timeline provided by Dinner is Served, No. 158 should–SHOULD–take all of 1 hour; but we all know that the timelines are typically all kinds of wrong, so I started at 6:00. I wanted to get ahead of it.

So here is what went down:

6:00 Start assembling ingredients and supplies. Put English muffins in the toaster over and pre-heated the oven for the ham.

Note: I used the New Jersey delicacy, Pork Roll. Why? Because the last time we visited Mr. Sauce’s family we left with 4 packages of Pork Roll.

Why we would leave NJ with multiple packages of processed meat product? Because Mr. Sauce, Sr. loves a good grocery deal and loves to buy in multiples.  I look forward to Mr. Sauce returning from a visit home with bags of cleaning supplies, canned goods and pasta and jars of random things–whatever was on sale at the Shop Rite that week. It’s like a mystery bag.

OK, I digress. Thanks Mr. Sauce, Sr. for all the baked beans!

6:20 I begin balling the melon.

Note: they did not have ripe honeydew (it looks like honeydew in 185’s photo) at the grocery store so I used cantaloupe instead.

6:25 Balls in fridge. I begin melting the butter for the Hollandaise sauce. I do a bit of quick research on how to poach eggs because the last time I did was when I made Bette Davis’ Red Flannel Hash.  I separate the yolks for the sauce.

In my notes I wrote here “check Brian.” Check his what? His temperature? Making sure he’s still in the apartment? That he hasn’t sneezed blood everywhere? I made this in September, don’t ask me to remember this.

6:37 I bust out the blender and make the Hollandaise.

6:45 I put the sauce in a bowl over a pot of water to keep warm. 

6:55 I rinse and then cook the asparagus–I lightly simmer it with a bay leaf and 2 cloves of garlic. There is no room for me to toast the almonds, so they stay uncooked.

7:05 I start the water to boil for the poaching

7:13 the pork roll is in the broiler

7:15 poaching commences!

7:20 the toaster oven is on. My eggs are failing. The recipe says 4 minutes per eggs. What?

(this is when my notes get crazed and scrawled)

7:30 Flipped Ham. Mifu

FORGOT PORK

SAUCE CURDLED 

HATE EVERYONE

7:41 eating

this is actually very good. 

It was very good, though not pretty.  The Hollandaise broke and the English muffin was a little more toasted than I would’ve liked, but it did taste like Eggs Benedict.

But the melon balls in Creme de Menthe was the work of someone who had lost grip of reality. Or at least their taste buds. It was inedible. Nasty. What the ever-loving fuck, DiS?

I mean, some Creme de Menthe on some ice cream, put it in coffee or hot chocolate–but for the love of Cher, don’t put it on melon.

I hope you all remembered to turn your clocks back this weekend.

Image result for cher if i could turn back time gif

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13 thoughts on “185. Eggs Benedict

  1. This has got to be the *best* cooking’/recipe website ever!!!! The remarks make me laugh and the reviews are on point! Please don’t stop!

  2. Falling back is my favorite time of year. I love the shorter days, I love the chill in the air (relatively speaking since I live in South Louisiana), I love it all. And this sounds delicious.

  3. How odd…I just made Eggs Benedict yesterday! It’s a Sunday brunch favorite at our house.

    I use an electric mixer instead of a blender…but I always thicken it over a make-shift double boiler (same sauce pan that I later use for poaching). I don’t keep the sauce warm, but do thin with water and reheat it over the boiling water just before serving…it’s never been a problem.

    Silver Screen Suppers and I have discussed poaching, and both swear by the Vincent Price method (and using one of the detached beaters from my mixer, seems to give me the best “swirling water”). A splash of vinegar in the water helps too.

    Because we’re vegetarian, I use a nice tomato slice (and sometimes some smoked Provolone) instead of the ham (delicious). Roasted potatoes (or hash browns) are a must with our Eggs Benedict (so yummy with the Hollandaise)!

    As to the Creme de Menthe and melon balls…it sounds a lot like my reoccurring nightmare of Seafoam Cantaloupe Pie! LOL

    1. See, you have your system DOWN!
      I might just buy those little poaching cups that they sell now.

      Also, the use of a tomato slice instead of ham is a super-good idea. Especially for dieting. Which I am, like, totally going to do soon. ha!

  4. I love, love, LOVE me some Eggs Benedict! You’re braver than me for trying to make it though, I’ve not attempted it. I love it in all its different variations, including the classic with ham, but sometimes when dining out, I ask them to sub bacon for the ham. Yummy!
    I’m with you on the melon balls with CdM…eww.

  5. You can whisk in a little water to the Hollandaise and unbreak (er, fix) it – I do this every time I make it, because it is super fussy. Eggs Benedict is a stressful prep meal – I don’t know how to not make it stressful. Perhaps my choice of making an individual plate of it for each family visitor on Easter doesn’t help.

    I too love falling back, and have no qualms about falling asleep at 8pm on a late fall/winter evening. I like that the morning has become brighter and a better time to be awake.

    1. Thank you for the Hollandaise tip!!!
      You make Eggs Benedict for everyone on Easter? Mad respect.

      I want to go to bed at 8 tonight!!!

  6. So I totally giggled when you wrote “6:20 I begin balling the melon.”

    Anyhoo, how is Brian? Poor kitty.

    And I feel like melon stands on its own. Why would it need Creme de Menthe?

    1. LOL. There are no answers for the creme de menthe question.
      Brian is oddly good. He is absolutely ravenous. I think he’s making up for the weeks where he wasn’t eating. I’d like to fatten him up more! He’s being very affectionate and he has happy tail and is playing with his toys. He sneezes sporadically, but that’s it.
      I have no idea why all of the sudden he is better.

      1. I’m so glad Brian is better! 🙂

        Eggs Benedict is one of my favorite meals. I second the fussiness of Hollandaise; I get it right maybe 1 time in 10. I use an egg poaching pan with the little cups because I’m even worse at poaching eggs in water than I am at making Hollandaise. (Did I mention we eat brunch out most of the time?)

  7. Yum. This looks and sounds great. Plus you have reminded me how much I love Bette Davis’ Red Flannel Hash. I may have to make that for my din-dins tomorrow.

    My hollandaise ALWAYS splits. I am going to master it someday…

    JX

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