For Christmas Day, the fam and I did what we have done every year since whenever it was we retired the goose. We made a big ol’ Prime Rib. I really love Prime Rib.
Prime Rib. Huh.
So they (whoever the hell THEY is) say that women in their 30s are supposedly in their “sexual prime.” (you like how I made that leap?)
It’s an interesting notion. Now, I watch a lot of Amazon Prime–that’s totally the same thing, right?
No? It’s not? Well, shit.
OK, as you might have guessed, I took a bit of a hiatus from dating after Match.com was such a damn waste of money. But in the past week I have dipped my toes back into the OKCupid dating pool.
And now, It’s BAD DATING STORY TIME!!!!
So, since I’ve been active on the page, I’ve been receiving messages. I got one today asking about my mid-century furniture and whether I rehab my own. So I look at the guy’s profile. He seems cool, positive, active. Loves animals.
But then get a load of this misogynist bullshit (unedited–emphasis mine):
I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t put this in here. If you are friends with all your exes I’m not the guy for you. I don’t want to deal with guys who have humped my GF. Its not insecurity……. its realism. If you have had Friends with benefits I’m not going to be the guy for you. If you can’t control your vagina I surely don’t want to try. If you have had sex in the last 30 days or so I’m not going to be the guy for you either. That just seems a bit too “UNFRESH” for me. If you are into hunting or have close family members who are ALL OF YOU will hate me and what comes out of my mouth …….. and I’m not a small guy with no balls. If you think its cool for a 30 something or 40 something to randomly bang 20 somethings keep moving. Again, learn to control your vagina. Of course a 20 something will have sex with you. Its not because you’re hot for your age. They would likely have sex with an actual pig if given the chance. Don’t kid yourself.
The rage. All the rage.
Now, according to him, it’s totally not cool for 30 and 40-something women to have sexual relations with men in their 20s; but this is what he’s looking for:
Looking forsingle women, near me, ages 27‑68
Hi, pot. This is kettle. You’re both fucking black.
He has two profile pics. One is of him and a random child; and this is the other…
So, kittens, THIS is what’s out there! THIS is who messages me.
There is a part of me that wants to write back to him something along the lines of:
No, I don’t refinish the furniture. AND YOU ARE A SEXIST, MISOGYNISTIC PRICK!
But I won’t contact him because he definitely seems like the type of guy who would internet stalk you (maybe even real-life stalk you!) because you dared to reject him.
I’m just saying that the longer this goes on…
…the better and better that sounds.
Now let’s make some Prime Rib!
My brother made asparagus with a Gorgonzola sauce. I made a horseradish sauce using fresh, grated horseradish (I can’t get enough horseradish) and sour cream. The sauce was delicious both on the beef and the slashed baked potatoes. I used this recipe to make balsamic glazed onions. In lieu of the tomato-cucumber salad, my mum made a delicious one with apples, candied walnuts, gorgonzola, and a mustard vinaigrette. It’s a perennial favorite. I should really get the recipe.
This was good. Meat and potatoes, baby! The prime rib was cooked just the way I liked it–medium rare.
Remember–only 3 dinners left!