Bisquick Impossible Buttermilk Pie

Another Bisquick Impossible Pie! And this is the first time I went sweet and not savory.

impossible buttermilk

Courtesy of Click Americana

To refresh your memory, in addition to completing the Dinner is Served! cards this year, I also want to make all 12 Impossible Pies from The Bisquick “No Time to Cook” Recipe Book.  Taco, Lasagna, and Quesadilla have already been tackled; with this Buttermilk Pie, I’m already 1/3 of the way to my goal and I still have a lot of 2014 left.

Buttermilk Pie Ingredients

Only 6 ingredients!

I decided to bring this over to Rick and Ronny’s house one evening that they had me over for wine and lentil soup. I opted for this because I had all of the ingredients on hand. Well, except for one thing—buttermilk. Oh, you know, just the ingredient that gives the dish its fucking name. No big!

Well, actually it was no big! I consulted the following book, which I got for Christmas this year from my bro and my soon-to-be sister-in-law:

Help from Heloise

1981 edition

Well, that clever Heloise had a solution to my problem right there on page 82:

Help from Heloise

I had vinegar!

Who am I to question Heloise? Heloise is an American institution!

I don’t know how much of a difference real buttermilk would make in this pie, but I really didn’t care to find out because buttermilk is always pricey and only in the quart size and recipes always only call for a cup or two and the rest goes to waste. I hate waste. So thanks, Heloise for the tip!

Here is the pie pre-baked…

unbaked pie

And here is the finished product, with a bit of fresh fruit garnish:

Impossible Buttermilk Pie

The tin foil I used in transit peeled off a bit of the pie. Whoops!

Bisquick Impossible PieThis was pretty good: like a cross between a custard pie and a giant sugar cookie.  A crust didn’t form like in some of the Impossible pies I have made before, but that’s okay. And it wasn’t as eggy as some custard pies–which can sometimes be a little off-putting.

So I’m going to chalk this one up as a success. Speaking of successes, look at the gorgeous Chocolate Mousse cake that Ronny made for Rick’s birthday later that week:

chocolate mousse pie

The bottom was just brownie mix baked in a springform pan and then topped with homemade chocolate mousse. It was delicious. And gorgeous—because I did the garnish. Hey, I know my way around a fanned strawberry.

OK, and now just some random thoughts. It’s free HBO week so I watched the remainder of season 3 of Girls. Will someone please tell me why I keep watching this show? For every single relatable or funny moment there are 15 that are completely annoying, improbable, or just stupid.

RE: Lena Dunham being naked all the time. I’m just over it. Initially it was refreshing. And I know that the point is to show nudity in realistic situations (although I can tell you that me and my friends have never just hung out in the bathtub together) and that by presenting the nudity of a woman who doesn’t look like a model, it forces us to reassess our idea of beauty and what a ‘real woman’ is. Ugh. Don’t get me started on the ‘real woman’ thing. Unless you are a live doll or a robot, any woman is a ‘real woman,’ okay?


She wore this for an entire episode. She rode a bike in this bikini. She tried to go shopping in this bikini. I don’t care if you’re in a beach town–if you are going to ride a bike or think you’re going to go into a store, put on some goddamned pants. And shoes. She’s not wearing shoes. Who the hell rides a bike without shoes? 

Anyway, I really don’t care about the shape of Dunham’s body, but here’s my beef: no one–no one–is that naked all the time unless they are vacationing at a nudist colony. I dunno, maybe even nudists are clothed more than Hannah. Her nipples should get billing right after Adam Driver.

And sweet baby Jesus, please stop having Marnie sing. No. One. Cares.

The only character I think I even like is the girl who initially was the most grating. I really enjoyed when she tore everyone a new one at the beach house:

Preach, sister!

But after this season’s finale I guess my biggest pet peeve is that I can’t believe that Hannah Horvath would ever be admitted to the Iowa Writers Workshop. If for no other reason just because her personal statement would be insufferable.

And while we’re speaking about insufferable:


As always, Deborah’s nail colors are named after songs. With music being an emotional force of the show, the four shades are aptly named with song titles that symbolize each of the GIRLS’ distinct personalities. Independent, feminine, playful, sexy and of course complex – there is a color for every kind of mood. The collection is witty and empowering while celebrating the various dimensions of feminine identity.

Colors Include:

  • HANNAH: Hapless Hunter Green
  • MARNIE: Prim And Proper Pink
  • SHOSHANNA: Virtuous Vivid Violet
  • JESSA: Bohemian Burgundy

I think I just threw up a little. Hold on, let’s go back a few sentences, what did that say?

The collection is witty and empowering while celebrating the various dimensions of feminine identity.

Yes, I often find my nail polish empowering. And  I celebrate my unique feminine identity every time I put on a top-coat. Don’t you?

Ugh. What bullshit. Sorry for ranting. Oh, and happy April Fools’ Day.

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20 Responses to Bisquick Impossible Buttermilk Pie

  1. Jen says:

    Good tip on the Buttermilk. I don’t like buying it either. Is it me or does it go bad faster than regular milk? I also have a kind of like/dislike with the whole Girls show. I mean, I like the witty banter. I like the whole “comfortable with who she is and what she looks like”. I like that the girls are smart and don’t have to be nasty. But, for serious, who the hell quits a good paying job in NYC because they don’t want to write ad copy?!? And then shames her brand new coworkers for being sell outs?!? Way to network Hannah.

    • Yinzerella says:

      Maybe they wanted Hannah to write copy about nail polish inspired by a television series. That’s enough of a reason to quit, amiright?

      But seriously, who does that? It wasn’t just good-paying. Did you see their break room? It’d be worth working there just for the snacks.

      And don’t shame the dude who took care of your drunk ass when he could have just left you on the curb! And can I note that although she was technically clothed, her nipples were still on display in the bathtub scene. They really are the breakout star of the show.

      • Jen says:

        Right?!? Can’t you be a poet AND have a real job? I agree with you on the nipples being part of the show but what about her tattoos? I feel like they intentionally find clothing to make the tattoos look as out of place as possible. I mean, how many dresses with back cut outs can one unemployed girl own? It’s like, the whole show there’s all this witty banter and important dialogue. And I’m just looking at her arms like, “What IS that a picture of?”

  2. Not only could Hannah NOT get into the U of Iowa Writer’s Workshop, Dunham also cannot get onto U of Iowa Campus to film some Girls. The University shut that shit down, and I couldn’t be more proud of my alma mater. Man, I sound like a cranky old grandma!

    • Yinzerella says:

      I read that. They said that it would be too much of a distraction or something. It was pretty cool when they filmed “Wonder Boys” on Carnegie Mellon’s campus. They made it snow.

      • Buzz says:

        Since we’re reminiscing about this, I remember when they filmed a couple shots of Good Will Hunting on the MIT campus. It wasn’t much; most of the “university” scenes were filmed in a Canadian high school (and it showed). They just closed off the main court for one day and kept all the students far away. It was an annoyance.

  3. Conor Bofin says:

    Happy AF day to you too. The pie is at the usual standard for this stuff. I envy your resolve.

  4. S. S. says:

    I’ve only found one recipe where the buttermilk actually made a difference in taste over the vinegar substitute, ever, and that was waffles. Though in my experience it keeps a long time in the fridge- I think it’s that like yogurt and cheese it’s already got microbes living in it.

  5. Michelle says:

    I really miss Hints from Heloise. It was often my favorite part of the newspaper. She (and later the daughter) would come up with the strangest things. And, good lord, I just can’t stomach Girls.

  6. This pie was one of my Granny’s go to recipes. I feel like it was her small way of rebelling, because every time she made it she’d put it on the table and say, “It’s not actually impossible, ya’ll.”

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