Hannibal the Cannibal Canapes Burgundy

It’s here! It’s here! The season 3 premiere of the best damn show on television, Hannibal!

I can’t say enough about this phenomenal television series. And, for serious, yinz guys, why aren’t you watching it yet?

I absolutely love Hannibal. It has all the trademarks of a show that I would be totally down with (see also: Twin Peaks, The X-Files, Six Feet Under, American Horror Story)

• Weird dreams
• Murder
• Surrealism
• Batshit insane characters
• Mad crazy sexual tension
• Gore
• Pretty people in pretty clothes
• Bizarre ways to die!
• Amazing guest stars
• Mystery
• Spooky music
• Great sound design

Plus, there is Scully.

And, I want to say that Mads Mikkelsen KILLS IT as Hannibal Lecter. He’s the best. Suck it, Hopkins! #SorryNotSorry

In preparation for today’s big show, I made a Hannibal-themed dish and tucked into season 2’s finale, the epic Mizumono.

So, those are the meats that I bought last weekend.

And yes, oxtails or beef kidney or pig feet (especially the pig feet–heeeeey, Mason Verger!) would have been appropriate, but I decided to go with a dish from my copy of the Playboy’s Host and Bar Book by Thomas Mario (1971 edition).

OK, this may gross you out. Because raw meat. But it’s a good way to introduce steak tartare to those who’ve tasted raw beef!

This doesn’t weird me out because I always taste my meatball mixtures raw to make sure the seasoning is just so AND my Pap Pap was a fan of a Cannibal Sandwich, which I think was just ground beef, salt, and pepper on white bread. And that sounds delicious to me. Is that so wrong?

So, no, I had no qualms about making an uncooked dish.

I couldn’t find a Burgundy, other than big Carlo Rossi jugs, so I went with a Pinot Noir (it was French!). I’m not hating on big Carlo Rossi jugs, because I can make a mean Sangria out of those. But aside from the wine sub, I just halved the recipe and followed it to the T.

I also made my own rye Melba rounds because I had some rye bread in the freezer.

So, here they are. AND THEY ARE DELICIOUS.

Meat? Good. Wine? Good. Capers? Love ’em. Parsley? I grew my own!

Of course, they should be served with a Mason Verger Martini (tears of children optional). Or, perhaps a nice Chianti. (but that should be saved for liver and Fava beans).

I chose a red background, because BLOOD. But my snowflake plate because it’s always snowing. The show is shot in Canada (see also: The X-Files).

I baked some of the meatballs for those of you who may be squeamish or what not.

They were good, but the cooking made them really salty. Raw is the way to go.

Want to see some of the other Hannibal-approved dishes I’ve made? And by Hannibal-approved, I mean anything involving organ meats, check these out:

• Tongue Italian Style
• Liver a la gourmet
• Stuffed Beef Heart
• Chicken Livers in Sherry 

Now, I don’t want to do spoilers, however, I thought it’d be fun to write down some of my random musings while watching last season’s finale and eating raw meat. It’s what Hannibal Lecter would want me to do (EVIL!)

They really aren’t spoilers, to be honest.

BUT FIRST!

Watch this.

HOW CAN YOU NOT WANT TONIGHT’S SHOW AFTER THAT?

Here are my finale thoughts:

• So few men can wear all-plaid and get away with it
• Shit, Mads Mikkelson is a sexy dude
• I love that they cast Freddie Loundes as a woman. And how is her hair so perfectly spiraled?
• I want a MEMORY PALACE.
• He smelled him. He loves smelling him. What kind of insane olfactory receptors does this dude have?
• Why don’t I own black satin sheets?
• OK, maybe I don’t want black satin sheets
• The food styling on this show is BONKERS (check out Feeding Hannibal)
• GO RUN OFF TOGETHER!
• Lamb is totally my favorite meat
• Hello, Miranda Hobbes!
• The music is amazing on this show
• Morpheus returns!
• I need to sharpen my knives
• This show has everything AND epic fight scenes? YAAAASSS!
• Seriously, my knives really need to be sharpened
• You look really hot all disheveled and bloody, dude
• Um. You’re still alive?
• My lord, this show is gorgeous
• HOW FUCKING LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR BALTIMORE COPS TO SHOW UP?
• That is a really fabulous jacket you’ve been wearing all episode, Will Graham
• The Blob, is that you?
• Holy shit, you are still alive!
• Murder family. Make a murder family.
• Seriously, HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR BCPD TO SHOW UP?
• And then, this:

OK, that may have been a spoiler. But that is totally how I reacted.

I don’t know if they were unsure at this point as to whether or not there was going to be a season 3, but if there was not, it would have been an excellent ending to a series.

I mean, it was open-ended and PERFECT.

I’ve watched the finale at least 3 times now and it is spectacular.

And remember, seasons 1 and 2 are available FOR FREE if you have Amazon Prime (which you should just have anyway. 2-day shipping all year long for just $99? Um. HELLO!)