110. Filled Omelets

A little fact about Dinner is Served. They’re not all dinners. In the latter part of the set (from 99 on) there are salads, desserts, and appetizers. And there are also brunches! #110 Filled Omelets is my first brunch.

Brunch should be shared with friends (and morning cocktails) so I thought that entertaining guests was in order. Cleve and I invited over our mutual friends (and fave gay couple)  Jon and Dan. Now, I don’t want you to think that we invited J&D over because I was making brunch or that I was making brunch because they were to be our guests (it’s like which came first, the chicken or the egg), but we all know that the gays know a thing or two about brunch (who loves stereotypes?) so I had to bring my A-game.

First things first, I had to be dressed for the occasion. I thought that Mimosas just scream muumuu. So I got to break out this lovely ensemble for the first time this summer:

Since I was dressed for the occasion there was no reason for me to not start cooking at 10am.   I was expecting our guests at 11:30 with the intention of serving brunch at noon (just like DiS!). But it wouldn’t kill me to start a little early, right?

I began with the fruit salad, which was pretty standard. But of course my Safeway didn’t have ripe papayas (and let’s be honest, I don’t know what the hell to do with a papaya–although now I just thought of Gray’s Papaya and really want a hot dog and one of those Orange Julius-type fruit drinks. Damn. I didn’t appreciate that as much as I should have when I lived in NYC). Anyway, cantaloupe was on sale so I opted for that. Strawberries and lime were still a go. So I went about cleaning and cutting and slicing and getting my fruit salad to look somewhat like #110’s illustration. At 10:27am I had that in the fridge and cleaned up after myself.

10:37am. I decided to make some tea for myself (that’s what I’m drinking from the MAZEL mug in the shot above). And I cut the tomato slices, chopped the green onion and put both in the fridge to chill alongside the fruit salad.

At 11:05am I started the oven to preheat for the bacon/ham. Now, I use the bacon/ham terminology because #110 asked for Canadian Bacon from a 3lb can and I don’t know if they ever did sell that anywhere (maybe in Canada?) but they sure as hell don’t carry that at the Safeway in Baltimore on the corner of North Charles and 25th. The Canadian Bacon they carried was in small vacuumed packets of fancy shmancy organic/free-range Canadian Bacon that cost $4 for about 4 slices. Well, screw you and the horse you rode in on, Nature’s Select or whatever the hell you’re called. I did a little improvising and went for the cured quarter ham (pre-sliced). What’s Canadian Bacon anyway? Ham, right? Eh, the price was right (and I am a genius and knew what I would do with the leftovers in the future).

At 11:20am my ham was in! And then I sauteed my mushrooms. I was right on schedule to serve my brunch at noon.

11:47am. I told those boys to be here at 11:30am, so they’re a bit late. Well, by my standards. No biggie. The bacon/ham is supposed to be in the oven for an additional 20-30 minutes once glazed. So at this point I glazed my bacon/ham. I don’t keep dark corn syrup in my kitchen so I opted for a mix of honey and light brown sugar. But at this point I should have been getting my tiny shrimp and bean sprouts heated. I also didn’t want to put together the egg mixture before my peoples showed. I also wanted a goddamned Mimosa.

1o minutes later. The ham began to fall apart. Dinner is Served! was displeased.

At 12:15pm How lovely, they’ve arrived! Thus begins a flurry of activity.

I mixed the eggs, took out the ham, and made sure that all the fillings were warmed, and I plated the hell out of #110. Just one thing left, to make the omelet itself. So I revved up the electric skillet.

By the way, this was the debut of my electric skillet, which was perfect for the ‘make your own’ omelets because the skillet maintains its temperature and it’s really non-stick. I bought the skillet because I thought it would be cooler to cook with than turning on the burners on my gas stove. Smart move, right? Well, in theory it is.  I quickly found out that I cannot have it on simultaneously with the AC without blowing a fuse; thus completely negating the whole point of purchasing the skillet in the first place! Is this a good time for WTF Brian? I think so. BAM!

I don’t know why I was surprised by this. From day 1 in this apartment: Toaster Oven + Microwave = blown fuse. So why was I shocked by AC + Microwave = blown fuse, Skillet + Microwave = blown fuse, or Toaster Oven + AC = blown fuse?  I haven’t had a reason to try the skillet and the toaster oven at the same time, but I know what will happen. I will blow a fuse and then scale the kitchen counter to get to the fuse box all the way above the over-the-fridge cabinets. I’ve gotten quite good at it (Interestingly, my trusty crock pot hasn’t interfered with any other electrical devices. So at least I’ve got that going for me).

Electrical issues aside, the skillet cooked the omelet like a dream. The egg cooked evenly and came out of the pan in a snap. This was the easiest omelet I had ever made.

Alas, the last part of the meal I did with the oven on, 2 stove top burners blazing, the electric skillet turned up, and no AC. Me and my muumuu were hot and unhappy.

But, I was happy with the end result. And Jon & Dan brought the orange juice and sparkling wine! At 12:25pm I completed my first brunch.

BRUNCH IS SERVED!  (although unlike the dinner cards I am not told “Bon Appetit! Enjoy Your Dinner!” Just that it’s served. Perhaps I’m not to enjoy. Brunch just is.)

Not bad, eh? And let me tell you, it was pretty good. I don’t know how the 3 gentlemen liked it (everyone made their own omelet on the skillet utilizing the egg mixture and whichever mixture/balance of fillings to suit their tastes), but I thought #110 was A-OK. I initially thought that the DiS! prescribed fillings were a bit odd–not because I don’t like those things–but because I don’t think of bean sprouts and shrimp as standard omelet fare (and there wasn’t any cheese!). But I am happy to report that it was very nice. These worked. AND I used the leftover shrimp, mushroom, green onion and sprouts to make a simple fried rice–I just combined them with some cooked rice, soy sauce, and 2 scrambled eggs. Yum.

Anyway, regardless of the technical difficulties, I chalk this up as a win. Even if the omelets had been rank and the fillings were a miss, there was still ham, croissants, fruit, Mimosas, and butter. I was as happy as a clam. A sweaty, happy, muumuu-clad, brunching clam.

You know what else would make me happy? If you’d subscribe to DiS! There’s a button somewhere on the right side of this thing. You know you want me (Brian, too) sent directly to your inbox. Cheers!

Recipe from Dinner is Served! 1972 Marjon Promotions, Inc.