130. Hamburger Wheels (1973)

I GOT THE 1973 CARDS, BITCHES!!!

Welcome to Dinner is Served 1973! Ready your self for 84 more dinners full of Jell-o, tarts, questionable foreign fare and canned tuna.

I made this inaugural dinner when I was home for the Christmas holiday. I had my parents pick what dinner they wanted. Out of selections like Cheese Nugget Spaghetti, Chicken a la King, Polynesian Tuna and Zippy Sirloin Strips, they picked 130. Hamburger Wheels.

When my mother was flipping through the cards she stopped and exclaimed, “Mystery Meat!”

My dad’s ears perked up. “Meat roll? I loved meat roll!”

Long story short, apparently the same company managed the cafeterias at both colleges my parents attended, so meat roll a.k.a. mystery meat was a staple when my parents were in school in the early 70s. My father was one of 2 people that my mum knew who liked mystery meat/beef roll.

Whatever you call it, Hamburger Wheels was their selection. Although my father was worried that there wasn’t a gravy.

There was. It was basically canned  cream of mushroom soup.

An FYI, Hamburger Wheels makes me think of Wagon Wheel Watusi. Hit it, Cher!

But I digress, let’s get to the matter at hand, shall we?

First thing first, the Waldorf Salad. I used the Curry Waldorf recipe I used years ago in #57 Chicken Pot Pie. The recipe is a winner.

curry waldorf salad recipe

So then it comes to the beef roll–sorry, Hamburger Wheels–I refuse to believe that it was just because we used gluten-free Bisquick, but this dish went downhill quickly. The ground beef part was easy-peasy, but oh my, the dough. And the rolling. Or the non-rolling, if you will.

hamburger wheel loaf

I mean, my dad helped me. We used parchment paper to spread out the gluten-free Bisquick and we put the meat mix on top. And we tried, oh how we tried to jelly roll that shit. But yeah. That’s what it looked like. A giant log.

And I know that there are a lot of different rustic dishes, that look like that, but these hamburger rolls were supposed to look like this:

But my version looked like this:

hamburger wheel 1 There ain’t nothing “wheely” about that shit.

But, whatever. This was the final dinner with the salad, broccolini, and mushroom soup gravy:

hamburger wheel dinner

Dinner #130 was by no means horrible taste-wise, but there was way too much Bisquick for the amount of meat.

I promise that as I move on with the 1973 cards, I will try to do a much better job of recreating the dish like I used to!

But, you know, it was Christmas and I wasn’t in my own kitchen.

So I will try to make it up to you with this:

christmas steven
It’s Christmas Steven!

That is Steven in his Christmas wear.

Steven belongs to my brother and my sister in law. He is an absolute peach.

And if you’re curious as to what’s going on with his outfit–every year for Christmas Day we make prime rib and my mum buys Christmas crackers…

christmas dinner
My brother is ashamed to be part of my family.

…which obviously include paper crowns.

Anyway, I hope everyone had a good holiday season whether you celebrate Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, or Festivus;  and I hope that everyone has a fabulous 2017! Especially me because mine was a goddamned dumpster (trumpster?) fire.

Cheers, everyone!

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22 thoughts on “130. Hamburger Wheels (1973)

  1. So far my 2017 has been a dumpster fire someone has shit on. In the 1st 2 weeks I got into a car accident. Not big just a scratch on my car and hers but still and I lost my freaking job I had only had for 2 months on top of losing our rights left and right but that new nut job in office. This year has to get better or I just don’t see a point.

    1. OK. That is horrible.
      I was so hoping that 2017 was going to wipe 2016 out of our minds.
      Also, this is the first time I’m seeing this comment—the spam blocker is being a bitch.

  2. O…M…G…NEW CARDS! I’m so stoked! I have only read your card adventures in the binge version (as I’ve told you about 6 non-creepy times that I love you to pieces), but not I get to watch the action unfold from the start. This dish reminds me of one my mom used to make. She’d roll out the tube croissants, put crumbled beef, cheese, and bbq sauce and bake. I loved it. My stepdad pretty much divorced her for it. (My website is a work in progress – don’t click!)

    1. YAAAAAS! And I’ve already made a 2nd one (I just gotta blog about it!). Let me know when your website is ready to go–can’t wait to read it 🙂

  3. My mother made a similar dish. There was cornmeal in the dough and the meat was Jimmy Dean’s Spicy bulk sausage but otherwise….I do remember that after rolling she would place in the fridge for a while, because we were in TX, IDK? but it did firm up the roll and made slicing easier. She sliced before cooking. People would actually ask for the recipe. Which line of vintage cards were these? McCalls?

    1. This series is Dinner is Served published by Marjon Promotions. The first set was published in 1972 this is from 1973.
      They were used as a promotional item at gas stations and grocery stores in the early 70s

  4. Did you bake before slicing? Looks like the recipe says slice before baking. I don’t know if that would make the difference. Because it looks like you would get a heck of a lot more than 6 slices!
    Also, Christmas Steven is dashing.

    1. Yes, baked before slicing. I don’t think it would have made a difference given that it was falling apart as soon as it happened. I am posting further photos today.

  5. The hamburger part sounds a lot like a “Loose Meat” sandwich (the name is more exciting than the dish) in a biscuit crust. I remember eating many rolled foods circa 1973, but not this one. It almost seems like it needs chopped pickles in there to really capture the times.

    Happy New Year!

  6. Oh my gosh – my mother made this once for dinner! I don’t think she followed the recipe exactly, though. She liked to substitute things, so there was no celery, she used seasoned salt, and she used a basic brown gravy. Still, this is funny. Thanks for the blast from the past!

    And Happy New Years!

  7. Well, I don’t feel so bad that my dishes don’t resemble the artist’s rendering. I may experiment with crescent roll dough. Steven is handsome & clearly a good sport! Happy post-holidays!

    1. Happy post-holidays to you, too! Yes, I think that crescent roll dough would be a much better option. Let me know how it turns out if you try it 🙂

  8. Greetings from the UK. Lovely to see you, and your family sporting paper hats. I work with lots of French people and they find the paper hat a most peculiar tradition and they all try to get out of wearing them when we go out for our work Christmas lunch… I’ve had 4 different paper hats on over this festive season… It’s traditional in our house to fall asleep wearing one.

    I thank all the stars in heaven, that the 1973 Dinner Is Served set is in your possesion. What with that, and the Brian and Margot kiss, I know now for sure that 2017 is going to be a fabulous year.

    “There ain’t nothing “wheely” about that shit.” Says it all for me.

    Bring on 2017!

    1. From your lips to god’s ears that 2017 is a humdinger of a year!
      Also, sorry that I didn’t reply to this sooner–the spam blocker on the blog here is being wonky.
      So happy new year to you and yours!!!!

  9. Your post broke me up. Firstly there was the thought of cooking anything as awful as this hamburger wheels recipe. Your result had me in stitches.
    Happy new year, ya mad thing ya.
    Conor

    1. Happy New Year to you, too!
      Also…how did you get the mobile version of your site look so damn good?
      (those chestnut stuffing balls looked divine)

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