Happy New Year!
You asked for it–ok, no one asked for it–but based on your comments it seems like you all really get your jollies from my romantical follies (oh, I love rhyming!), so here is a quick rundown of the year that was Yinzerella’s first foray into the dark, scary (yet oddly entertaining) world of online dating.
Here, courtesy of realitytvgifs.com, are my responses to some of the choice guys that I went out with this year:
The guy who told me (multiple times), “you’re so neurotic”:
The guy who called my accent quaint:
The guy whose shirt was unbuttoned enough to show off his gold medallions:
The guy with sleeves who complained about the fact that he was frequently asked about his tattoos:
The guy who sent me inspirational texts:
The guy who took the centerpiece flowers from a wedding:
The guy who bitched about fat people the entire time:
So there was the 30+ guy with one female roommate. Whatever. But then there was the over-30 guy who had TWO female roommates:
And then the guy whose roommate was his ex-wife:
Finally, the guy who cried over the phone when one of his 50 million roommates moved out and took the cat:
And that, my lovelies, is all she wrote. I got some guys in the pipeline for 2013, but I don’t know if I will choose to see them or not. But if I do, you know that you will have a front-row seat. I promise.
But seriously, after those dudes I’m feeling like Miss Milania here: