74. Tongue (Italian Style)

I know, I know, I know. Two weeks in a row without a Wiener Wednesday. But I’m giving you the only thing that could replace a Wednesday wiener, and that is tongue.

I can’t even apologize for how dirty that sounds. All of the correspondence involving this dish was unintentionally lewd. But my favorite was this text, “I’m going to join Claire for tongue if that’s OK with you.” Fine by me. Consenting adults and all.

I simultaneously dreaded and anticipated dinner #74 from the first moment I opened up my avocado green recipe box. Beef tongue? I never ate tongue let alone tried to cook one. I had some reservations and questions–first of which was “where the hell am I going to get a beef tongue?” (that was answered thanks to Relay Foods). The second was “who the hell is going to eat beef tongue with me?”And that was answered by four of my fearless friends.

4 RSVPs? That’s a party. A Tongue Party!

So the tongue was delivered to my door (yeah, you read that right. Tongue delivery!) on Sunday morning. It was frozen. It was big. It was gross. It was quite intimidating.

This is the 2.5 lb tongue once it was defrosted.  Why is it spotted? Is it from a black and white moo cow?
This photo I took for scale. And for skeptical face (which isn’t pretty, but it’s truthful).  I didn’t want to touch the tongue, but I quickly got over that. Look at that fucker! It’s massive!

So I got the tongue washed (!) and all ready to go before the party started. The first part was boiling it for two and a half hours to get the ‘skin’ off. And by ‘skin’ I mean ‘taste buds.’ *shudder*

Beef tongue. Post-boil
The skin peeled off easily in a few big pieces
Peeled, it looked a lot like a human foot. For serious. Like it just had a pedicure. Sans toes.

And then the whole thing went into a pot with the bay leaf, ham, onion, carrot, canned tomatoes and dry vermouth (I subbed that for the wine). The directions said to “simmer covered until tender.” Well, could you vague that up for me, Dinner is Served? I don’t like it when there aren’t set times. Whatever.

Sadly, right when I got the tongue in the sauce, I got the call that my friend Claire was ill so her and her boyfriend were out. Two guests down. But my friends Noah and Kristen were still joining me so the Tongue Party quickly became a Menage a Tongue.

I let the tongue simmer for a while and hung out with my guests until we got hungry. I just assumed that it would be tender after another hour or two (that assumption ended up being correct).

And when we got hungry I sliced the tongue and put together the side dishes.

The sides were super-simple. The head of cauliflower I steamed (whole) and then topped with a lemon-parsley butter. The red potatoes were boiled and then tossed in butter and dried dill.

So there ya have it. Dinner is Served!

Not bad, right? I think I got this one mighty close to the original photo of #74.

Kristen made the Pineapple Upside Down Cake. Which was quite lovely. I think the nuts really made it.

So, you wanna know how the tongue was, right? Well, it was good. Really good.

Say what?

I don’t know what elicited this response, but from henceforth this may be Emily’s WTF face. And how cute is the apron?

Shut the front door!

I shit you not. The tongue was not only edible, it was tasty! It was very pot roast/brisketish. Super-tender and the sauce was honest-to-God-well seasoned. How odd is that for a DiS! meal?

Noah and Kristen even agreed with me. And Kristen hated tongue when she had it in France (that so sounds filthy).

The sides were OK, although under-seasoned (surprise, surprise). But that is why God created pretty salt and pepper shakers–for at-table (or, in my scenario: at-TV tray) seasoning. Well, and the shakers exist for people to buy at souvenir shops and then amass huge collections which become the gateway drug for hoarding. You start with one commemorative Kate & Wills royal wedding shaker set and before you know it you can’t get into your kitchen and there are dead cats under stacks of old issues of the National Enquirer.

But I digress.

Sure, it wasn’t the tongue party that I initially intended it to be (and those who missed out did miss out) but three’s company was A-OK by me (I love me some Noah and Kristen!) and the tongue was a success! Dinner is Served! for the win!

I went on to make beef tongue once more!

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21 thoughts on “74. Tongue (Italian Style)

  1. I think you’re brave. Tongue is not uncommon here in Norway, particularly around Christmas. But we get it skinned from the butcher’s. Here it’s usually served with Scandinavian sweet’n’sour sauce, broiled potatoes and weggies. You can also find it thinly sliced on a Christmas buffets.

    If you think the tongue was gross you should have been there when my mother made her special pickled pork roll before Christmas. It was made from the meat on the pigs head, so we had two halved pigs heads soaking in the kitchen for several days. The roll was great though 😉

    1. Did you see my Jellied Veal post? That’s right up your smorgasborg!

      Thanks for calling me brave, but I still can’t bring myself to do the jellied pigs feet that I keep saying I am going to make!

      1. We have those jellied pigs feet in Norway too. My sister used to love them as a kid, and I couldn’t and still can’t for the life of me understand how she could eat them even though I have been in all over both Africa and Asia and eaten stranger things than most 🙂

      2. Checked out your Swedish Jellied Veal and saw that you at least had what looked like cranberry jam, mustard, and pickled cucumbers and beets to cover up the taste with 😉

        Cranberry jam and mustard is particularly good for covering up horrible tastes, they use a lot of it in Sweden .-)

  2. My sister once had tongue. She didn’t know it was tongue. She said it was good, but could not eat more when she realized the yummy meat she was eating was tongue. Sister is now a vegan. The closest I have come to an edible tongue was at the supermarket when I was a kid. I would pick up the huge cow tongues and chase my sister around the store whist making slurping noises.

  3. I’ll admit I haven’t read the post yet, but it’s because I was distracted by the title.
    Now I can’t stop singing Tongue Italian Style to the tune of the theme song from “Love, American Style.”
    Thank you so very, very much

  4. I am on a packed commuter train from Manchester to London and everyone keeps looking at me as I laugh out loud at this whole tongue adventure. The strangest looks I got where when I saw the first photo of that tongue and I kind of squealed and went BLEAH at the same time. Fuckeroo. I’m gonna get me some tongue.

  5. I love tongue- especially Lengua tacos. But u have to find a really authentic place. Your facial expressions are priceless!

  6. This is the most disgusting post I’ve ever read – the pre-cooked tongue is vile!
    The apron is cute but I’m lovin’ the yellow nail polish.

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